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考试面试模拟题:如何理解躬自厚而薄责于人!

  孔子说:“躬自厚而薄责于人,则怨远矣!”意思说做人,尤其是做个君子,重要的是要严格地要求和责备自己,而对人则采取宽容的态度,在责备和批评别人的时候应该尽量能够做到和缓宽容,这样就自然不会招致怨恨了。

  Confucius said, "if you bow to yourself and blame others, then you will have a long way to complain." it means that to be a man, especially a gentleman, it is important to strictly demand and blame yourself, and to take a tolerant attitude towards people. When blaming and criticizing others, you should try to be gentle and tolerant, so that naturally you will not incur resentment.

  在我们现实生活中也是如此,要求我们在平时的工作和学习中多做自我反思,同时少指责别人,把这作为人立身处世的重要原则。在生活中,人往往容易原谅自己,为自己开脱,找借口掩盖自己的过失和不足,倒是常常责怪别人,把失误或者过错归咎于别人,不但自己失去了反省自己和找到自己不足的机会,而且,也会引起别人的反对和埋怨,甚至是憎恨。

  This is also true in our real life, which requires us to do more self reflection in our daily work and study, and at the same time, less blame others, as an important principle for people to live in the world. In life, people tend to forgive themselves, excuse themselves and cover up their faults and shortcomings. Instead, they often blame others and blame others for their mistakes or faults. Not only do they lose the opportunity to reflect on themselves and find their own shortcomings, but they also arouse others' opposition, complaint and even hatred.

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  然而,正如曾国藩所言“严于利己,宽以待人”,古往今来也不乏这样的事例:唐代魏征为太子李建成的属官时,曾多次劝李建成杀掉李世民,但当玄武门事变后,李世民不但没有杀他,还给了魏征很大的官做,而且非常器重魏征。更终实现了唐初的繁荣发展,出现了贞观盛世。故事当中李世民便对魏征抱以宽容的态度从而贏得了人心。同样的,蔺相如因为“完璧归赵”有功而被封为上卿,为在廉颇之上。廉颇很不服气,扬言要当面羞辱蔺相如。蔺相如得知后,尽量回避、容让,不与廉颇发生冲突。蔺相如的门客以为他畏惧廉颇,然而蔺相如说“秦国不敢侵犯我们赵国,是因为有我和廉将军。我对廉将军容忍退让,是把国家的危难放在前面,把个人的私仇放在后面啊!”这话被廉颇听到就有了 “负荆请罪”的故事。

  However, as Zeng Guofan said, "strict in self-interest, lenient in treating others", there are many examples: when Wei Zheng was the official of Prince Li Jiancheng in Tang Dynasty, he had repeatedly advised Li Jiancheng to kill Li Shimin, but after the Xuanwumen incident, Li Shimin not only didn't kill him, but also paid great attention to Wei Zheng. Finally, the prosperity and development of the early Tang Dynasty was realized, and the Zhenguan era appeared. In the story, Li Shimin held a tolerant attitude towards Wei Zheng and won the hearts of the people. In the same way, Lin Xiangru was granted the title of Shangqing because of his merit in "returning to Zhao with perfect skills", which was based on incorruptibility. Lian Po is very unconvinced and threatens to humiliate Lin Xiangru face to face. When Lin Xiangru learned about it, he tried to avoid and allow it as much as possible, and didn't conflict with Lian Po. Lin Xiangru's disciples thought that he was afraid of Lian Po. However, Lin Xiangru said, "Qin dare not invade Zhao because of me and general Lian. My tolerance for general Lian is to put the national crisis in the front and personal hatred in the back. "When Lian Po heard this, he had the story of" pleading guilty to a thorn. ".

  无数的古语与经典故事告诉我们,生活中要将心比心,严于律己,宽以待人。一方面,拥有吃亏是福的心态。面对利益的诱惑,面对他人的误解,保有一种宽容之心去面对;另一方面,真正做到换位思考。面对是非,多站在他人的角度去思考,真切理解他人的难处,真正做到善解人意。

  Countless old sayings and classic stories tell us that we should compare our hearts, be strict with ourselves and treat others with leniency. On the one hand, it is a blessing to have a loss mentality. In the face of the temptation of interests, in the face of other people's misunderstanding, keep a tolerant heart to face; on the other hand, really do transposition thinking. In the face of right and wrong, think from the perspective of others, truly understand the difficulties of others, and really be understanding.


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